December 6/2016

Finally the day I have been waiting for. I get to see my surgeon. Our morning started early again. Boy I sure do need some sleep one of these nights. Jamie does too. My tossing and turning keeps him up also.   We left home at  7:30. Headed into Edmonton, we see a car with the license plate BK 3680. BK for BJ Kerr he would be 36 and he was born in 80. I tell Jamie it is a sign. Everything will go good today. We stopped for a timmies first. ( Jamie needs his morning fix). On the drive to the Kaye Centre, Mac called he said he had the day off, and he said “we” are coming to be with you Mom. I said who is we.   Mac and Gordon both took time out of their busy day and came to my appointment with Jamie and me.  

My doctor is a tall woman and no bull kind of lady she comes in with a note pad and pen and Starts to write down all our options. She first tells us all the tests are good, they see no more cancer anywhere else in my body ( thanks BJ for the sign this morning)  Then there is a knock at the door. In comes Doogie Howser I see Mac and Gordon make eye contact. I know they want to laugh. But this is to serious a day. No laughing. Not out loud at least. But my doctors helper looks about 12 years old. A shorter Doogie Howser but yip a Doogie Howser. Anyway, we hear all the options, none are easy. All are going to involve some kind of pain I am sure, and Chemo and Radiation too . My doctor was so great she talked to the boys,and Jamie and told them all the good and bad. Explained all the procedures, the surgery and recovery. Then her and I talked as I was going to make the final decision. I knew from when I first found out I had breast cancer what I was going to do.  I had talked it over with Jamie and told both the boys my thoughts. I decided on a double mastectomy. Ok all good she says. My nurse will call you tomorrow with a surgery date. Mac says before Christmas. Yup before Christmas she says. I said she is no bull. Straight to the point. Let’s move on. Some paperwork is done and if we go. 

So I don’t have the exact date but finally a plan of action and I know what I am going to do. Some relief in knowing there is no other cancer anywhere. ( for now). 

Tonight Jamie and I sit in quiet thought, Christmas tree glowing a fire in the fireplace and I actually feel at peace because for the first time in 8 weeks I know what’s in my future. I know my game plan. 

This is the little saying we saw today in the doctors office I really like it. Sometimes you will never know the ” Value of a Moment” until it becomes “A Memory”   By Dr Seuss   Ifound great value today having all my boys with me as we walk through the dark doors of cancer together,  again. Hopefully to come out the other side all better and with 2 things I can live without 😊
A little disclaimer from yesterday’s post. I didn’t mean I don’t like nurses or that all nurses are bad. Just everyone has their bad days. I totally understand that. I have them too. I have had some of the greatest nurses lately , especially the nurses I had a Fort Saskatchewan hospital.  But just that we all need to take a little time and be kind to one another you never know what other people are going through. Or maybe just maybe get a perm 

Beth 😇