Hard to believe it has been 4 years ago since I started my journey with cancer. It was one of the hardest things I have ever had to go through. I felt alone and isolated and actually at times I felt like it was me against the world. It was a very deep dark time in my life. No one understood. Until I met other cancer survivors who had walked the same road as I. No matter what their cancer we all understood each other on a deeper level. We all shared that fear of death. The fact that we were facing a death sentence together.

Also hard to believe is was almost 24 years ago that our precious son BJ died. I totally felt alone, so isolated from the rest of the world. I felt no one, could understand what I was going through. Until of course I met other parents who also lost a child. Only then did I fit into a small space in the world where someone understood. Someone got me. Someone hurt like me.

Fast forward 2020 and the whole world is facing a crisis we have a pandemic on our hands a deadly virus called the corona virus or coved-19. It is killing people at an alarming rate and going up and up everyday. The powers that be the smartest people in the world. Scientists, doctors, chemical engineers and so on and so on. Nobody can figure out how to stop this virus. Not even how to slow it down. People are not scared enough. I fear!!

I feel that only now people can understand the fear I had when my precious and beautiful son died. The fear when I got cancer not only once but twice. How your heart races and your head is pounding and you feel like the whole world is off its axel. How all of us are afraid that our loved ones could die. All of us are scared that we could get this horrible awful virus. It has put a fear into us, all of us that life is so very precious. Life can change in a moment.

The isolation is starting to get to people. I know it is getting to me. Day after day not going anywhere or seeing anyone. Talking to myself seems normal now. I even answer back. Lol. I of course am not the normal because my Jamie has been away working. So I really am alone day in and day out. But many people are with their families at least they have each other. It is going to be a great time for families to re-connect to each other. Maybe even to fall in love again. Then there are seniors like my Dad who is also isolated and so alone. Nothing to look forward to day after day. No visitors not even the people in the lodge with him are aloud to visit each other. So I ask people if you know anyone who is alone like my Dad please give them a call it could be the only thing that breaks the day up. So call your neighbour, your friend, your Dad, your Mom. Keep in touch the only way we can right now by phone or for the computer savvy FaceTime or Alexa. Whatever works for you and your loved ones . And those who know my Dad call him I know he would love it.

My next thing is. I have felt the wrath of some not very nice people around me in the last few months. I try hard to be nice to people. I never go out of my Way to be mean to anyone, but these few people who have entered my life in different ways have tried so very hard to be nasty mean people. To take me down, of course while Jamie is away and I am more vulnerable. Why ???? Why ???? Do some people want to be mean and angry and hurtful to others. We all make mistakes, we all do wrong, but pick it up say sorry make up and move on. Don’t stop talking, and every chance you get try to screw with people and their lives. Don’t put up gates, or cancel auctions……or refuse to pay for things you used for a year, or make people pay for things they never used. Don’t talk about your neighbour or your friends behind their backs. Let’s all just be nice to each other. Life is short and we all need each other now. I feel things could get a lot worse before it gets better we all need each other. Love one another ❤️❤️

Lucky me tomorrow my Jamie comes home after being away for 7 weeks. The world has really changed since he left. I fear he really doesn’t know how much. He works long hours and doesn’t get much news right now. Our home is in an uproar, our garage/shop is in an uproar. We have stuff everywhere waiting for our auction. I have our trailer packed. Ready to roll May 1st. Where we will be able to put all this behind us and move on and move even closer together in our 400 sq foot new home. Leaving almost 1400 sq feet. But I can’t wait for the adventures we will have Babe. Let us roll.

We are having our Auction April 12/2020. It is an online auction. You can pre look at everything the week before the auction at our acreage. We will have only a few people at a time gloves for everyone, hand sanitizer. We will have all precautions. we should have everything up and online by early next week. I will put on FB all the info. I hope everyone will check it out and buy all my junk……oops valuable stuff. Hope to hear from everyone and look forward to seeing you all a couple at a time. Gloves and masked.

Tonight’s saying: Don’t let the ugly in others kill the beauty in you. 👍🏻❤️

Beth 😇