January 21/2017

I know the word death scares most people. The truth be told it scares me too. But I wanted to talk about it. I am not talking about it because I think I am dying, although I know that someday I will too. This isn’t about just me dying it is about death.  It’s my blog I can write about anything I choose. I choose to write about different deaths. Here it goes. My thoughts. 🌺

We all know that we will die someday, but are we ever ready to die?  There is death of terminal illnesses. I mean when someone is diagnosed with a terminal illness I think they are actually able to say their good bye’s, plan how they want things done.  Like if you want to give someone special in your life some of your special momentos you can do that. Give them a note from you , somethings  you made for them. Whatever. I am sure it is really hard to do this and say good bye. But there is closure this way. 

I remember my poor Mom she tried hard to stay here with us, she so loved her family. Her doctors never really told her that she was terminal, they gave us hope right to the end. It broke my heart how we didn’t have the time with her to say all our final heart felt words, to just tell her that last day she was the best Mom ever, how lucky my sisters and I were to have her. I know she would have taken the time to give us some final advice, her beautiful hugs and love to all of us. I always felt so ripped off not know that morning would be our last day with her. It was so unfair. We just didn’t know.  

Then there is when someone dies suddenly. Like my son BJ. First off kids should never die before their parents. But it does happen. I am living proof it happens to families. When someone dies so sudden there is no time to even prepare for death. I don’t know if it is easier to know ahead or not. I have been involved in death both ways. I am here to say I didn’t like either way.  But the shock of a sudden death is so heart wrenching you never ever get over it. You have no warning, you don’t even have the thoughts of death on your mind, and yet death has happened. 

There is also death by your own hands. I do t really believe in this one. But until you are in that place where you feel you have no where to turn, I don’t think you can judge. I belong to a group for parents who have lost a child ( I don’t really like that word “lost” my son is not lost…..I know where he is, he has died ) I have learned that the survivors that are left behind after a suicide suffer so very much. They very often feel guilt even though it is not their fault. This person has chosen their own death date. 

The death I do agree with is the one when you are terminally ill and you the sick person gets to chose when,where, and how you want to die. It must give such peace to know you can spare yourself and your family from the horrors of hospital deaths. Where you just wait day by day until you just die. I call this a hero’s death. ❤️

Death does not have a calendar ! So it follows no time..We never know when our time on earth is over. So let’s live every day like it could be our last.😘

Beth 😇