March 28/2017

Today was supposed to be my third round of chemo, but when I saw my oncologist (Dr Dick Au) yesterday, I explained how I have been so sick first with nauseous then severe diarrhea. He said that I had been to sick to long and cancelled chemo for at least a week.  I was a little sad at first because it just prolongs everything. But really I knew I was not feeling good enough to get through it right now. 

But then the shit show started  ( pardon the pun ). This dr is so into himself that I tried to talk to him about what all I was going through, how sick I was and he wanted to talk about going to Vimmy Ridge with Justin as he called him. Cathy and I finally figured out he was saying Justin Trudeau. He went on and on about what a privilege it was to go and how great it was going to be there on the 100 th anniversary with Justin. I found myself drifting off as I now needed to go to the bathroom again. I finally cut him off mid sentence as he was finding it hard as he said to describe the privalage of going there. I said ok so what are we doing with me? He said yea you need a week or so off to get stronger because if I send you now for chemo it is like I am punching you in the face. I kid you not, you can not make theses things up. He actually did say that. Then he decided to do some stool samples, he asked me if I lived in the woods and if I had well water because I could have a parasite. I had told my dr I lived in the country and it was an hour drive into the cross. He thinks I am some back woods hillbilly. Finally I tell him I live in the country in a house not a igloo/ log cabin with no heat or water and I actually have city water, and a furnace.  

Off I go to the lab, oh my gawd what a crazy place that is, a young technician was totally confused, she told me I can’t do this stool test if I am on any drugs at all or taking any thing for diarrhea..does she not know this is the cross cancer institute everyone here is on some kind of drugs, and I now look like a sick person, no hair and so white in color I look like a glass of milk. And the stool test is because of the severe diarrhea. I have to explain all this to her. Meanwhile she has another technician getting together all the supplies I will need for this stool test, that my dr wants done today while I am there. He is shuffling papers back and forth, and folding and unfolding the  instructions I will need to follow….he does this for 10 minutes and at least 10 times, finally Cathy and I look at each other and we get the giggles, now we can not stop laughing. This young guy keeps folding and unfolding these papers. I don’t think he wanted to talk about poop with me,it was so crazy.

But now I have gone to the bathroom about 5 times in all the waiting, I don’t need to go right now, on command,so off to the cafeteria where Cathy and I have a sandwich and a drink to get me going. I was so hungry and had not eaten since the night before.  But cafeteria food was not that good today. We both got turkey which turned out one of which was roast beef. What a day. 

 Finally I go to look for a bathroom to do my stool test and we realize I have nothing to gather it in, we are laughing so hard now at the crazy day I almost peed my pants. Cathy goes of to find me a plate or cup or something and I have to fill out a form on my sickness. Oh my gawd it asks if I live in the back woods somewhere if I eat raw meat and if I have any diseases that causes diarrhea? That’s what I am here to find that out? Finally I do my thing and off I go to hand it all in and there is a new technician who asks me another 50 questions about why I have diarrhea. I finally tell her I hope you can tell me soon…….Good-bye.  

I am now so sick and tired I just want to go home. Cathy and I stopped first to get some ensure for me, just to give me a little boost with my food going through me so quickly. Lynne meets us at my place and we have a sisters visit and Lynne brought a pizza. I am lucky to have two such great sisters going through this crazy cancer/chemo journey with me. 

So then this morning I realize that, my dr told me I have to have fluid through my port ever three weeks. Today is three weeks. So I call the cross and talk to a really nice nurse who was so kind and compassionate she re-newed my faith today.  I told her about my chemo being cancelled for today but I was worried about my port. She then tells me that my dr had not yet cancelled my chemo for today and she thanked me for calling because the chemo drugs are very expensive and if I had not shown up they would have gone to waste, that is a big expense, she says. Really I was not even calling about that I was calling about the port after a long conversation she told me she had to check everything out and she would call me back. I thought well that’s the last time I talk to her. But 1/2 an hour later and she calls back, she has now cancelled the chemo before it was already made up and I can wait another week to get my port cleared out.  So all good for a week. Or at least I hope so. I will still follow up next week on the port. 👍🏻

I am home now I have a couple of days, or a week,trying to get my strength back up, and start to feel better, so that maybe next week I can get those crazy toxic chemicals back into my body and start this craziness all over again. 

Today’s saying : Never think you are weak if you cry. Every tear is replaced with wisdom and STRENGTH.  So I will cry me a river ❤️

Beth😇