March 5/2018

The days and weeks fly by so fast. Every night I go over and over in my head where I was last year at this time. I find myself everyday at least once or twice going back to last year. Not because I want to, but because it is my life. A big part of my life I do not want to re-live but yet over and over again I do. I think it is mostly fear. Fear that I don’t ever want to go there again, and fear that with the type of cancer I had I probably will be faced with it again someday. So how do I put this behind me ? I have no idea. Except to live each day better than the last, put one foot in front of the other and keep going. So for the last year that’s just what I have been doing. And I guess I will continue doing. With the little devil riding on my shoulder, because it is my life, I will live it…

Jamie and I have been really dragging our feet on getting our house ready to sell. I am having a really hard time getting started, I just have so much stuff. I have no idea where to start. I also have no idea what to do with everything. I really do want to downsize but I want someone to do it for me. Any volunteers ? I am taking applications  lol lol 

Jamie and I have planned a date night with our beautiful Grandaughters, our niece Desiree got us tickets to the premier of the new movie A Wrinkle in Time. We are taking them Wednesday night. Not sure who is more excited them or us? We don’t get much alone time with them , it is very precious to us. Thanks Desiree ❤️

So this short hair thing, not sure I am really liking it?  I will say it is easy “BUT” I think it needs to be cut every 3 weeks to keep the style up.  I love the cut about a week after I get it, then I like it for a week then the next week it needs to be cut again 🤔 so now what to do ? Grow it longer or keep it short ? Also I don’t want to go blond again “BUT” I need some kind of color or streaks or something in it to give it some body? So confusing, I need help!!!

Last week was my son “Mac’s” 35th birthday. Wow !! Where did the time go?  I can’t believe my baby is 35.  I am so proud of the man he has become, and the wonderful Dad he is too. He choose to take the same path in life as his Dad and became a welder. He works away from home for long periods of time and stays in crappy little motels and camps. But when he comes home his kids and his fiancé are so happy to see him. I saw that first hand when I was at his house waiting with his fiancé and kids, waiting for him to come home last Saturday.  Having been away in BC for work. The whole house went crazy screeming and yelling, even the dog was going crazy to see him. That only happens if you are a good man and you have a family that loves you. He has both.❤️❤️ I am one proud Mama   Love ya Mac 😘

Today I booked my trip to Mexico again, to go back to the clinic for my third round of treatment. Jamie is coming with me this time and also getting a full work up. We leave Easter Sunday and come home Friday the thirteenth. Not sure that Friday the thirteenth is a good day to travel but that is how it works out. We are going to stay on the San Diego side to start and maybe move to the Tijuana side after a day or two. We will see. I think I will just feel more comfortable in San Diego, but if I am going to try the other side it would be best when Jamie is with me. I have also talked to a couple of friends who I met the first time I was there last year. And we are all going to meet up, I look so forward to seeing them too. 😊

Tonight’s saying : The thing about life; It is fragile, precious and unpredictable and each day is a gift…..not a given right.💜

Beth 😇